My conclusive thoughts....

At the beginning of this blog process I believed my blog would have a very distinct theme of education and its influence in my everyday life. Yet, as I began to free write my life observations each week, I learned my everyday life experience influences my education and academic learning processing more than I had anticipated. My blog began to focus on simple observations and conclusions I had drawn from the dealings of a university student. I will be honest in saying my ideas regarding higher education and its participants have changed and mostly not for the better. The majority of my blog is dedicated to life experiences and observations that I have found puzzling and/or frustrating. Despite my frustrations concerning higher education, the blog process has actually been an educational process by allowing me to explore my irritations through text. After reading through my blog I realized I consistently attempted to teach my audience a lesson. These lessons range from the college survival guide (panties are a must), to food remaining a staple in folkloric culture (green St. Patty's beer), to analyzing a step by step process for finding the perfect bridesmaid dress (while avoid the measuring tape of a strange woman). Education remained a theme throughout my blog, yet the educational life experience of a normal routine became more of the focus. The blog process was only irritating, because I am the author and I could not find a way to write purely based in acadamia. An academic education is also important, but through this blog I have learned and shared that it is the everyday lessons learned that truly define a person and his/her ideology and personality. I hope my audience will also come to this conclusion by reading through my daily observations and experiences.

Happy reading,
Nikki

It has come to my attention...

It has come to my attention that the school semester is almost over. While, I am so heartbroken to sleep in during the weekday and save on gas money from a lack of commuting twenty-five minuets across town, I think I will somehow manage to survive without class this summer. I do not really have much planned, well, except that my boyfriend and I are going to the GREENDAY AND AFI CONCERT in Phoenix. I am not going to lie when I say I am beyond excited to see A Fire Inside (AFI) again. I really wanted to see Lady GaGa in concert this summer, but tickets were ridiculously overpriced. I am paying one hundred twenty dollars to see Greenday and AFI. Our two seats are center stage and about twenty rows back from the stage. Tickets to see Lady Gaga at stage left and one hundred rows after the pit were on-hundred eighty seven dollars apiece.

Ticket prices are ridiculous now-a-days. I remember, back when I was a youngster a whole four years ago, my friends and I paid forty bucks to attend an all day festival. A Ticket for the three day Cochella Festival in California was priced at about six-hundred bucks this year. Six hundred bucks, not including the two-hundred camping permit and seventy dollar parking permit oh and food and water, but no one really needs any of that when you have Jay-Z smoking out his audience.

I am beginning to wonder where this money does. I know for a fact touring artists do not usually receive a huge portion of ticket sales, because most artists receive about ten percent of merchandise and ticket profits. This ten percent is to be split up amongst the band and.or group members. I know it costs a lot to transfer stage equipment and provide a salary for roadies and merchandise sales associates, but I hardly believe that justifies one-hundred and eighty seven dollar nose bleed seats.
I honestly believe most of the profit is given to the record and/or management executives who copyright the creative aspect of the artist and show. Which is a shame, because this means music and art are purely generated for profit.

--Nikki

I am watching my niece.

My niece, Lillian, is three years old. She knows her alphabet, how to count to one hundred and one, and she is learning to read. She is a smart kid. And ummmm how does she choose to use this intellect you might ask? My niece, my Lillian, has decided to use her smarts to obtain every possible sugary sweet in my pantry. She has decided I will not give her "the best yum yums," so she pleads her case to her grandfather, her grandmother, her other aunt, and uncle...until somewhere down the line her story becomes so precise and empathetic that she gets her way.

It is adorable now. Everyone predicts she will be a lawyer, judge, perhaps even a journalist. Yet, I predict she will be a spoiled, rotten brat who will not take "no" for an answer. You see, she realizes "no" is answer, it is just not the right answer. For Christmas Lillian counted every single present under our family tree. Forty-two presents that she counted for an entire month. She named some of the boxes based on their wrapping paper, and she would rearrange the boxes by size and weight. Come Christmas Day she was beyond crushed to find she had only thirteen presents. She refused to open any presents until everyone allowed her to open her favorites; the ones she had named. Though, some of these presents were not her own.

I love my niece, and her little brain never will stop amazing me. She has my entire family, myself included, wrapped around her little finger. It is just wonderfully amazing that such a small little brain is already capable of distinguishing a goal and a means of reaching it. If only we were all that intelligent....

What I Have Learned This Semester:

It is usually at this time of year that I feel as though I have wasted way too much money (forty-two hundred bucks to be exact) on classes that have taught me nothing. I know, 'you only get out of school what you put in.' Well, I have put a lot in to school such as: time in which I could be sleeping, time in which I could be working, my stress, my tears, my brain power, my mornings, MY MONEY. Yet I feel, with the exception of one class, I have not really learned anything of academic use or relevance. It does sound awful, I know, but I feel as though I have wasted a lot of energy this semester learning almost nothing.

I spoke with a professor the other day about these feelings, and she suggested I change my major. I wanted to reply that I doubt changing my major would magically make professors feel inclined to teach me something useful, but she had not yet graded my paper so I didn't say that. Instead I politely said I would consider her advice. Then she gave some wisdom that did not sit well with me. She said "You don't go to college to learn anything. You go to college to get a degree."

I am going to school to be a teacher, so I hope by the time I get my degree I will know enough to teach.

--Nikki

Oh Dear...

I have registered for classes for next semester. It was an exhausting and irritating process to say the least. First, I found my advising appointment had been moved behind a week, because I was on file as a sophomore. This came as a surprise as I transfered in with sixty two credits and that is the credit limit for a junior. Well, long story short, Pima Community College did not transfer over my last fifteen credits...because I had missed the December graduation deadline. I thought this would not impact my credits transfered to the University, but since I am technically graduating with my AA degree in May PCC decided not transfer my credits until then. This means I had to pay an additional ten bucks to have my official transcript processed, and I had to take the time and effort to walk them down to U of A administration. (Let me say that the only helpful person during this entire process was a young INTERN by the name of Rachel, and I recommend everyone ask to be seen exclusively by her when attempting to deal with admin.)Rachel, my administration advisor, promptly input my transcript information that same HOUR.

Next, I spoke with my advisor. This was a pointless meeting as I took none of her advice, but this meeting is required and tedious. She would not allow me to register for an advanced non-fiction writing class as an elective, because I am not a Creative Writing major. I would be totally fine with giving priority to this major, but this particular class is not a requirement for CW majors. My advisor would not give me permission to take this course, because she advised for me to take some other none required elective that would have meant the same for me anyway. LAME! She also inquired as to why I was taking history courses, and I explained my minor is history. She said I should concentrate on my major, and I had to remind her I am a junior and should be worried about completing my minor requirements. She replied (I hope) jokingly stating I should worry about my minor my senior year like everyone else.

Now I am somewhat disappointed in the courses I am taking next semester, but at least I am enrolled. I don't even want to think about the hassle of financial aid.

--Nikki

My Top Leads (of 90s and 00s fame)

5. Teeny Pop
So recently Paramore has gotten a lot of press due to their presence on the, but they have been around since about 2000. I first saw them when I attended Warped Tour. I was fourteen, and their lead singer Hayley was fourteen. She was (and still is) five feet and two inches tall and was skinnier than me (hard to find). When I first saw her take the stage I was intrigued, but I was completely taken a back by the ability for this fourteen year old girl to get an entire audience involved with her band's relatively unknown music. This is why she is amazing: she can just as easily get audience interaction running around stage or standing still.



p.s.
she was 16 in this video....

4. Maynard James Keenan

Tool is an amazing band, and I could honestly go on about the talents of all parties involved. Yet, let me just give this paragraph to Maynard. His lyrics are raw and expose the most intense and devastating characteristics of human relationships. Much of his lyrics are dedicated to his struggles with addiction and failing relationships. His voice is flawless, and he sounds just about the same in or out the recording booth (no thank you auto tune). As an audience member it is difficult to avert your eyes from his passionate showcase of stage presence, and no one can deny his vocal ability.


p.s.
I miss the 90s.

3. Emily Haines

With an avert sexuality and gender ambiguity, Emily, has lyrics and stage presence that would make Lady GaGa blush. The front woman of the London based band Metric, Emily has no issue with poking fun at gender roles and society..."Tits out/Pants down/Over night to London/Touch Down/Look around/Everyone's the same," (Metric, Dead Disco). Emily will run on stage in a micro-mini and make the boys in the front row feel unworthy of looking onto her lady bits. It is her ability to confront the norms associated with gender roles as an added bonus (to her musical, lyrical, and performing) abilities that earned her a place on my list.



2. Gwen Stefani

So...she went crazy for a while? No one complained about the shiz of an album that resulted from Axle's breakdown (Chinese Democracy, really?). Gwen is a true rock star and creates a static energy in her audience with her energizer bunny dance moves. It doesn't matter that she and her No Doubt band mates are in their forties...I would still pay to hundred and sixty bucks to make sure I was in the pit to watch Gwen. Oh, wait, I did.



^^^^^ yep, I was right there.

1. MIKE PATTON

If you don't know who this is...take a few mins to educate yourself.









1. Davey Havok...

I have a tie. He is the vocalist for the alternative, punk band A Fire Inside.





--Nikki

Survival List Continued....

This is a continuation of my survival list, (Please see blog post number twenty...the one right below this one.)

-A Netflix Membership
Let's face it, we all procrastinate. I cannot tell you how many times I have completed an essay ten seconds before I have to leave for class. I suggest, if you choose to procrastinate, you might as well waste your time being entertained. I recommend the "watch instantly" section of netflix. EIGHTIES AND BEN STILLER MOVIES GALORE!



-Unlimited Texting
Again, for your sanity.




-An acquired taste for really unhealthy food...
Sure, I can find a way to prepare healthy/organic yum yums in between work, class, and commuting, but I am lazy. I would much rather pick up some nice greasy fries at Jack in the Box or some enchiladas at the Taco Shop. Don't kid yourself, because you will only have time and money for unhealthy food. There is no way you will have time to prepare or money to spend on a ten dollar salad five times a week. Fast food=brain food.





-An ability to turn down party invites
The University of Arizona is a party school, yes. Your education is important and expensive, yes. Your homework assignments are way more important to your educational experience at college than your lame party stories, yes. Remember, you can party all you want when you graduate and are looking for a job. In this economy you will be looking for a job for a while.



-An healthy outlet for stress
UGH!!!!! Midterms, Finals, Assignments, Work, Tuition, does it ever end? NO, it will never end. This is the stage in our lives where we prove we are adults and can handle adult situations. We are expected to do this on our own, because we got ourselves into this school...and only we can get ourselves out. Do not let all of the stress and pressure of college life get under your skin. Find a healthy outlet to relieve your stress. I work out, but I met a girl who would scream in her car when she felt stressed out. She would drive down an isolated enough road and just start scream obscene language...whatever works right?



--Nikki

A Must Have List For Surviving U of A Spring Semester

Through this semester I had made a list of material objects and mindsets one should have to obtain a complete college experience at the University of Arizona. Though, this list is purely my perspective, I have found many of friends and classmates agree with the majority of the items I have listed below:

-Sunscreen
Alright, I get it, people like the skin tones orange and bronze. Yet, our beloved university is located smack in the middle of a desert valley. The sun exposure from this last week alone has left a nice patterned tan line on my feet from my strappy sandals. You can be bronzy orange and still sun protected.




-Bug Eyed Sunglasses (stunner shades)
So half the time most of us are recovering from hangovers during our Monday morning lecture halls. It is almost painful to have to walk to class starring down the white glaring pavement of the sidewalks of the mall. Thank god for HUGE sunglasses that not only protect you eyes from the sun's harmful UV rays but also protect your vision from an assaulting, light inspired migraine.



-Shoes you can walk in!
I know, I know...strappy sandals, heels, and knee high boots are super cute. Yet, these styles of shoes make it impossible to arrive to class on time. It doesn't matter if you leave ten minuets early...you will still get to class ten minuets late. So, find some cute tennies and rock the flats ladies, because you don't want to cite fashion as an excuse for your lack of punctuality. Plus, your feet will thank you later.



-Undies are NOT optional! Please do not "forget" panties at home.
So you wanna wear impossibly short shorts, skirt, mesh dress? Please wear your underwear. The last visual anyone needs is your vagina in his/her face (don't argue with me boys, because you don't know where that thing was before it found its way infront of your eyes). Again, we are located smack in the middle of desert...with sand and stuff...do you want any of that to find its way up there?



-Bottle of liquid (non-alcoholic)
About two thirds of your body are composed of water and water based cells. Re-hydrate. Water is good for complexion, helps you loose weight, and keeps you hydrated through out the day. A bottle of water, Gatorade (They discontinued my favorite flavors, because the guy on the bottle found some pantie optional ladies. So now I have to suffer through the yucky taste of G2.), and/or tea. You will have more energy and feel less spent if you REHYDRATE.

This list will be continued....

--Nikki

Selling Jesus

So this morning I attended the Easter morning service at Christ Community Church. I do not typically attend this church, but my older sister raved about its large campus and elaborate Easter Sunday showcase (apparently, there was real, live horse and donkey involved). My family arrived just in time to find a seat, and our attention was called to the jumbo screens (yeah, this church has two of them on both sides of the stage) where an infomercial type of advertisement was exclaiming about a Christian marriage seminar. Tickets, apparently, were only twenty dollars in advanced. After this proposition, my family and I were subjected to series of advertisements, sign up sheets, and events that take place at the church annually and only cost half the price in advanced.


For those of you who are unfamiliar, Easter is a Christian holiday in which we celebrate the sacrifice of Jesus Christ in place of the sins of the human race. It is a pretty important holiday. The premise of said holiday is pretty much the foundation of Christianity, and I was subjected to view an infomercial. My father and I were both offended at this and were upset at the fact that this church was taking this opportunity (most people attend church only two times a year and Easter is one of those times) to preach the message of sacrifice and salvation to sell tickets for some random event. Now, I am sure these seat filling events are important to the fundraising and up keep efforts of this church (that has two JUMBO SCREENS), but I am pretty sure the salvation awarded to the human race should take the spotlight at Easter Sunday service.

I felt like Easter was just an excuse to show these money raising events. I realize Easter is commericalized, but it should not be so at a Christian church. I was disappointed in my Christian brethren, and I hope some patrons walked away from the service receiving the right message.

--Nikki

Dear Mother Smoking Outside Of My Work Place,

I realize I am not a mother and therefore I cannot fully comprehend the responsibility that rests upon your shoulders. I do not have a child, let alone four or five, as it appears you do. I work and study full time, so I cannot afford such pleasantries as getting my nails done at the salon next door to my studio as you do. I realize you may need a break from the intense labor of being a full time mother, but in this case perhaps it is best to leave your kids at home. Now, now...before you get upset mother smoking outside of my work place...please let me remind you that your children are playing in a very busy parking lot (unsupervised )as we speak. I realize you may have no one to supervise your children at home while you get your nails done, but is it really better to pretend you are supervising your children as they run around a busy parking lot instead of leaving them safe at home...out of the way of that giant, black sports utility vehicle that is about to back into your toddler? Good job, mother smoking outside of my work place, you managed to yell at your toddler to abandon his game behind that monstrous SUV and continue to play said game in front of my studio window. Oh, and you flipped the drivers of that SUV the bird for asking you to monitor the where abouts of your children, what a good role model you are mother smoking outside of my work place. Mother smoking outside of my work place, perhaps you are unaware, you lit another cigarette as your trouble making toddler appears to be licking the display window of my studio. You do not have to actually move from your smoking place, because you have managed to discipline your child with an order and name calling.

Thank you, Mother Outside of My Work Place, for being aware that your child is half naked in front of costumers.

--Nikki

The Ritual Sacrifice

In my Mexican history class we studied the ritual sacrifices of female virgins to the native gods and goddesses as a display of repentance and dedication of the people to the powers of nature and spectacles of the natural world. And, I walked up and down the ales of the wedding accessory store I could not help but think that my best friend is willingly sacrificing her freedom to pay homage to an institution as old as human society: marriage. Now, before anyone gets all huffy and puffy about my metaphor, I can draw a clear comparison between these two sacrifices.

1. Both the native female and the bride (usually) felt honored by the proposal of being offered up on a platter and willingly sacrificed the remainder of their lives to please a cultural institution and accepted symbols that highlighted the status of the proposal (treat v. a ring).

2. Months and months of planning are coordinated in hopes of flawless and romantical date. The perfect day must be set, invitations sent out, and a giant feast (or rehearsal dinner) must take place to ring in the importance of the ceremony.

3. After hours of preparation the sacrifice is fully attired in ceremony get up forced to perform a ritual dance.

In any sense the idea of a female offering herself up as a means of honor is somewhat an ancient concept. I am at the bridal shop waiting for invitations and wondering around a store in which no one else has seemed to have noticed this parallel, or maybe they have and have decided it is bad for business to call a wedding a "human sacrifice." Perhaps I am over reaching, but I do not think so. How many women have sacrificed their entire lives to conform to the institution of marriage...and do they regret it? I wonder if the ancients regret sacrifices themselves?



Perhaps rushing into the sacrifice is what makes it so in the first place.

--Nikki

Got My Bridesmaid Dress In....

As some of you may recall (I like to pretend someone is actually following my blog) a few weeks back I wrote about the parels of being a bridesmaid. Well, to avoid the all too familar fingers of some older, mature lady with a measuring tape across my bust, I did my dress shopping online. This is a plus, because the dress shops do not carry my size. (The smallest none-child size they carry is a size two, and I am a double zero. So anyone who believes it is more convient to be skinny is sadly misinformed.) I found the perfect dress in my size on a wonderful website for under a hundred dollars (Bridesmaidexpress.com). I ordered my dress in late January, and I recieved it mid-March. This is a pretty fast delivery time for formal dresses. I tried it on. In the mirror ritual, all of us females take part in, I danced with my reflection from one side to the other. I switched angles to ensure the dress would be flattering from all of the important angles (my ass looks great in it). As it turns out I still have no boobs, but I suppose no one will really care. I mean, it is not my wedding.

^^^^^My dress is Alfred Angelo style number 7016 for anyone who loves it.^^^^^^^

I am also planning the bridal shower. The maid of honor lives in North Carolina. The matron of honor never calls me back, and the other maid of honor is on her last semester before her masters; so I am planning this party solo. I am thinking garden party theme. There are lots of flowery bridal games, food, and decorations, so it should make things a bit easier. In high school my drama class performed Jane Austin's Emma. I was Emma, and the bride was Jane Austin. Back then we had this werid kinship that only soul mates share, and I have learned through this crazy bridal planning experience that I really do love her. A lot of the time people forget that education comes from life experience as well, and I believe she has taught me a lot through this medium.

Spring Break and 80s' Movies

So for Spring Break 2010 I decided to work an extra ten hours (two extra shifts), subsequently I had no energy nor desire to go out and party only to force myself through a five to eight and a half hour shift hungover. What did I do to entertain myself during this time of preordained none partying you ask. I watched 80s' movies on Netflix. Now this bit of information can mean one of two things: I have no life and existence is sad; I am a responsible college kid doing something financially rewarding for break. (Money is a nice thing to have in my sad existence.)

Has anyone seen Dragnet with Tom Hanks and Don Aykroyd? It came out in 1987, and it is probably the most hilarious detective spoof EVER made. Let me just say this movie made me miss the stereotypes of women used in the eighties as well as wildly offended at the notion of the virgin being suffocated by a giant snake. (Apparently, Hollywood was dominated by subtly naughty old guys in 1987).


Another great 1987 film is Raising Arizona. I am not much of a film buff, but the cinematography is amazing. The colors pop and contrast with the camera angles. This film made me miss when movies were not afraid to poke fun at society without becoming a lame political mockumentary. (Who really enjoys those Micheal Moore movies anyway?)


I am taking a history class that focuses on the time period in Mexico after its revolution to contemporary time. This class is unique, because it follows this history through the evolution of film. I suppose the subject material of this class regarding film and its required research of film techniques has found its way into my thought process while I watch films for entertainment. Awesome...the one thing I am doing for fun and entertainment during Spring Break 2010 has found relevancy in my education which, I might add, my brain is not taking a break from.

Enjoy the rest of spring break. I have work tomorrow morning.

Later,

Nikki

Midterms: AHHHHHHH!

It is the week before midterms, and I find myself completely stressed and lacking time to study, finish projects, and sleep. As time is a rare commodity of mine, I substitute the hours I should be sleeping for the hours that I study. I thought I'd be used to this hell week by now (fifth semester of college), but I am not. I spoke with my nutritionist last week, and she told me I need more sleep. I explained to her there was no room in my schedule for that, but I would consider moving some things around. I lied. You see, I have two jobs and a full load of sixteen credits. Everything I eat is in my car on my way to somewhere that I need to be...if I could somehow sleep while being transported to class and work that'd be awesome! As I only have six hours at night to study and complete assignments (I get home from work at nine, and I try to study until two or threeish to get four or five hours of sleep) I do not have time for the twenty minuets of studying and short breaks. I do a few hours of power study followed by a power nap.



Sometimes I wonder if too much is expected of me as a student, employee, sister, daughter, girlfriend, and woman. But whatever...I don't have time to think of the future implications of my life now. I have to make through yet another midterms week: I have three more to go. (I am trying not to count finals week, because that is a different ballgame.) I almost feel as thought eating, sleeping, and bathing are all a waste of time, and I need to GET BUSY studying, working, earning a degree, and starting a career. I just want time to be a young college kid, but I feel guilty going to parties, shopping, and even going out with friends. Yet, I feel expected by my peers to do those things too.

It's like I'm being pulled in one hundred directions, but I know everyone else is overwhelmed by their lives as well. So, I suppose I take solace in the idea that being this stressed out is normal.

--Nikki

Oh The Wonderful Experience of Dealing With a Crazy Professor

So on a whim I decided to enroll in an Introduction to Folklore class. The class fit well into my schedule as it only meets once a week at night on a day of the week that I do not work due to another afternoon class I am taking. I was somewhat weary of the class, because I admittedly have no idea what folklore is/means/does. So on the first day of class I sat midsection in the small room and awaited the arrival of my professor. After fifteen minuets (the advised time for students to leave in the situation of a professor being late and/or not showing up) of waiting my professor still had not shown up, and some of my classmates became frustrated and left the class. Within only moments I found myself agitated at the absence of my professor and left the room counting the dollars, gas, and time I had just wasted without having learned anything. The next week the class size had shrunk by one fourth, but I was still intrigued by the topic of the course and decided to give the professor a chance to explain her absence. At twelve minuets passed class start time the professor walked through the door somewhat frazzled and disoriented. She explained her tardiness due to the lack of parking near the building (I bought a parking space at the beginning of the semester to avoid this same issue) and her absence of the first class by a flat tire cased by vandals. She then proceeded to utilize fifty of the one hundred and twenty minuets of class time to take attendance and comment on students' names ("Nik, how androgynous?"). The professor then went on to explain she does not take attendance, give quizzes, give tests/exams, and our grade will be based on midterm and final essay papers.It is eight weeks into the semester, and the professor has been absent four of the eight classes and tardy to two. This last class the professor sent out an email explaining her absence (some friend go sick or something?) thirty minuets after class started, and she canceled the midterm paper.
I suppose I am most disappointed in this predicament, because I have not learned anything. When asked for a definition of folklore the professor provided a broad definition that included street signs and Pepsi adds. When asked for a course outline the professor answered to read our D2L readings. I honestly feel cheated as I have paid a lot of money for my education with an understanding that I would in turn be educated. I also feel as thought I am cheating: When I present my degree is it is understood I have earned all my credits. I will not have earned the credits for this class, because I still have yet to learn anything. I explained this situation to my father who replied "Oh, the wonderful experience of dealing with a crazy professor...welcome to a university."

--Nikki

You know it is ugly when the faces are blurred...

I am a bridesmaid, and though I am honored to become a permanent fixture in my friend's memory of life altering moments (marriage, wedding, bridal shower, dress fittings...oh the list of these apparently monumental memories goes goes on and on) I cannot help but satirize the wedding process of the American bride.

My frist experience in the bridal process was shopping for the wedding dress. This is literally a process of hours and hours of looking through bridal magazines that feature impossibly perfect and manican like "brides" who showcase dresses of the size 2 genre. Once particular styles are selected the bridal party (in our case the party consisted of the bridesmaids, mother of the bride, and of course the bride herself) journeys to the nearest David's Bridal to try on countless dresses. The moment my best friend walked out of the dressing room with THE dress on I literally turned to her mother who was tearing up and told the bride "I picture you walking down the asle right now." With this comment we, all five of us, cried like the sterotypical women in the sterotypical scene. The dress was selected, ordered, and fitted.

Then came the bridesmaid dresses. I have a nice bride who is not forcing us into shinny, huge, and ugly dresses. Instead she has opted to allow each bridesmaid to seclect her own dress as long as it is Victorian Lilac (apparenly, this is a real color). First, let's talk about how awkward and embarassing the dress measuring process is...some lady (who I have never met in my life) approaches you with a yellow measuring tape with bold black numbers to announce your size. This stranger then constricts you within this measuring snake around the most intimate parts of your body.

Um, does anyone else feel werid when someone is taking note of how many inches around your chest, waist, and hips are while she is partically inches away from those areas?

I was told I have no boobs. I suppose the measuring lady expected for my to wear a pushup bra, because she told me "small boobies look non-existant in dresses." To which I told her I would keep that in mind in the coming months. She suggested I take hormones to fix my issue. Then, after the overall measurments, I was told I am a double zero or a big girl size sixteen. Awesome...I've always wanted to be a big girl. I replied by singing the pushups songs. You know it "Mommy, wow, I'm a big kid now."

--Nikki

Earthquake

So this past couples of posts in my blog have just been observations of my everyday life, and the educated conclusions I have drawn from said observations. Yet, given the recent devastation in Haiti and now Chile I feel as though my everyday life and its meaning are superficial and have a minimal impact on the world and its future. I am currently studying to become a middle school and/or high school English teacher. I have a true passion for literature, and I want to bring that passion to students. Yet, this goal seems so...well...meaningless in this world of chaos. I have had many recent conversations with my boyfriend about switching my major or finding a career that will assist more people or imprint a larger and more positive change for future generations. When I was in high school I was dead set on becoming a politician and reforming the prison and conviction system, but as I grew into my passions and worked an internship at a political headquarter I realized I was too earnest of a person to work in the political arena. I watched as lobbyist convinced my heroes to become products in the government corporation in order to gain a capital of votes and voter respect. Though, much of this respect and trust was misplaced. (I recommend everyone watch Thank You for Smoking.) I know teachers are rewarded by the difference they make in each student's life. Whether he/she has merely learned something for a teacher or has truly changed perspective due to a teacher's guidance he/she walks away from a class having evolved as a person. But I want to help many people. I want to make a true positive change for not only my community but the universe. I just do not know how to do so, and thus I am considering changing my major. Though, I have no idea what I would change it to. Perhaps, Superhero...or Free World Leader...hell, I would even settle for Vain Celebrity to Lend His/her Name to Good Cause.

Wanting to make a difference,
Nikki

Netflix Night...

Advanced Writing Composition class last Thursday really got me thinking about the influence of life experience and opinions in the news as well as within any forum that is considered to be "unbiased." Biased as defined by Dictionary.com includes a source that is "fair, equitable, tolerant, neutral." I began to think of examples of sources that meets this criteria, but I found myself hard pressed to find any. At first I thought of scientific and mathematical facts that are well known, but as a research these facts I discovered many of which were only presumed to be facts. An example of this is pretty much any mathematical equations. Numbers and equations, as I am still puzzled to consider, are not tangible and therefore not true, unbiased facts. Apparently for a fact to be unbiased a person with political, economic, and/or personal interests could not have discovered it, because this biased discovery would lead to a partial gain.

Does this mean all of the scientific and political minds who discovered such institutions as democracy and equations as E=mc^2 were just biased benefactors of their thoughts?

Then, I thought, surely location is an unbiased fact. Yet, who dictates where a countries boundaries end and begin. Do the resources of a country allocate where a boundary is? Then would not a boundary become a biased fact that was influenced by the judgment of man?

I suppose the idea of what is a biased and/or unbiased fact and portrayal has me quit puzzled and confused. I now file away stories I hear on the television or read on the web as news commentary rather than unbiased and impartial news.

--Nikki

Food and Folklore

One of my biggest passions in life is food. I love (not an over exaggeration)finding recipes, creating a shopping list, prepping food, cooking food, entertaining with food, and OF COURSE eating food. Thus, it is my honest belief that the human being is programed to in fact plan his/her entire life around obtaining, preparing, and consuming food. Humans are after all animals, and we all NEED food to survive. Now, I understand subsidence in general is necessary for my survival, but I am in LOVE with food. I realized this more than ever as I sat in my Folklore class pretending to take notes on my laptop when in fact I was actually salivating over the online Kentucky Fried Chicken menu (Yeah, KFC has an online menu). It was not until the random acquittance to my left glanced at my screen, and she asked "Are you...are you seriously looking up fast food menus during lecture?"

This bizarre sentence intrigued our neighboring random classroom acquaintances which then captured the attention of the professor. Needless to say I was thoroughly embarrassed for allowing my admitted obsession with food impede upon my learning experience, but as I began to examine the topic of folklore I discovered food is embedded within many cultures. I mean manna within Christianity is often associated with God's promise to provide for his people. In fact, the representation of bread and wine during mass is symbolic of the sacrificial blood and flesh of Jesus. Religious connections aside, there is food in literature folklore as well. The house made of candy, gingerbread, and all other sorts of goodies in the children's story Hansel and Gretel is a prominate presence of food in folklore. Food in cultural folklore exists: chocolate bunnies and Easter, Valentine's Day and chocolate, St. Patrick's Day and Beer; turkey and Thanksgiving; the apple in Snow White; hot dogs and the Fourth of July. Food is present within our culture and deeply embedded within our culture's folklore.





Food is also present within our regional folklore: Rocky Mountain Oysters; Sonoran Hot Dogs; Freedom Fries; Fried chicken and ocra; sweet tea. When I visit my hometown (Beaufort, South Carolina) over summers sweet tea is on every menu from Sonic to four star resort restaurants, and many local stories and legends involve the drink that defines Southern culture and hospitality. Food folklore is everywhere, so I believe I have foundt he topic for my midterm paper.



--Nikki

p.s.
Just downed some sweet tea and ate some Krispy Kreme.

Perfect Woman?

Yesterday I sat on my couch in my living room with my younger sister ,watched a celebrity makeover count down, and gazed appalled at the host as he claimed Lindsay Lohan took the number ten spot for improving her body image. Yet, to my dismay, my younger sister not only agreed with this placing but wanted to become more like the twig like starlet.




Choosing my words carefully, as to not upset my younger sister's taste, I asked her what she found appealing about that particular body type.
She replied "I don't know. She's just not fat like me."
I was shocked and shaken by this answer. My younger sister, who stands at five feet almost eight inches tall and weighs in at about one hundred thirty pounds, is anything but fat. I honestly did not know how to respond with anything except "You aren't fat. You're normal."
To which she replied "Normal looking is average looking, and I don't want to be average looking. I want to be above average looking, which is attractive. Lindsay Lohan is above average looking and attractive."

I stared at my younger sister for a moment assessing her body and contemplating her words. I could not comprehend how she thought of herself as unattractive and fat. I tried to comfort her, but she began verbally attacking her own body as she compared herself to such beautiful celebs as Jessica Alba, Christina Aguilera, Miley Cirus, and the ultimate image of beauty: the Victoria Secret super model.







I explained to her the premise of photo shop, the profit gained by corporations by the instilled image of beauty, and the beauty found in the average looking women. She was unimpressed and unconvinced by my argument as she supported her own by stating "if average women are so beautiful why aren't they the ones selling things for brands and making money." Her argument made me feel outplayed by a thirteen year old, and I realized she was right...in a way.


The image of who the beautiful and perfect woman is as been rooted within our culture through commercialism and add campaigns. Yet, these women would be held as average if not for the advents of photo shop, plastic surgery, make-up, and of course flattering spanks (to suck in the fat under skin tight clothes). The average woman in the United States is a dress size 14-16 and 140 lbs. Is that really that unattractive?






After finding and showing these pictures (and others)to my younger sister, she studied them carfully. She confessed she had been on a diet to achieve that singed waist and pefectly round bottom Jessica Alba was famous for, and after viewing these photos she told me she felt lied to. I tried to explain a woman's body varries, and there is no such thing as the perfect woman.
She smiled and responded with "unless she knows how to use photoshop."


This conversation with my younger sister reminded me how awkward and comfortable it was as a young girl growing up and into an unperfect body. As an adult I look at adds and understand the woman looking back at me is manipulated with software, MAC, pushup bras, and high spray. Yet, as a teenager I would strive to compete with such images. It is unfair to depict a woman of impossible standards to younger girls trying to reach this perfection. What is more beautiful...a photoshopped image or an average woman? What is more attractive...a lies or honesty?




http://cocoperez.com/2009-10-15-ralph-lauren-really-hates-fatties

<3,
Nikki

I have learned stupidity and self absorption are entertainingly delightful.

Instance # 1
The other day I went to Paradise Cafe and Bakery on Park Ave for some soup. There was not much of line as I arrived, and I found a place behind three girls. I would have called shenanigans on these girls (work out and MAC makeup attired), but they seemed to be completely honest with themselves and the world. One girl was complaining about how long it took her to apply her makeup that morning, so I figured she was not trying to fool anyone. Just as I gave this girl credit for her honesty she turned to order her sand which and asked the cashier behind the counter "I would like a turkey sand which without the bread." The cashier behind the counter looked stunned and asked for clarification "So, you want a salad," and the girl replied "No, I want a turkey sand which without the bread." The cashier appeared as confused as I was. I thought maybe this chick was trying to be ironic, but apparently not as she allowed the cashier to charge her for a sand which...without bread.

Instance #2
I was part taking in a conversation with a classmate about the devastation in Haiti. Our professor had forwarded the entire class an e-mail explaining an opportunity to travel to Haiti for assistance through several volunteer programs. My classmate then divulge "My friend is going to Haiti. He is in a nursing program, and he is also in the Coast Guard. They are shipping him off to Africa within the next couple of months to allow him to help with the relief effort."
I replied "Wow, and he is also going to Haiti?"
The girl said "Um yeah...I think he is just going to Africa in general."
To which I asked "Well, how is he getting to Haiti from Africa?"
She said in all seriousness "Um, I think they are giving him a GPS."
I thought, I sure hope he knows how to swim.

Now I would like to say I was digested with ignorance of our youth culture, but to be honest I think it is pretty hilarious that this generation is going to be the one that decides if we the United States goes to war, into more debt, gets out of debt, and provides health care yo the population. I wonder if bread girl and GPS girl will be future campaign contributors.

<3,
Nikki

I have learned freedom of speech does not necesarily mean a choice of responsibility.

The other day in my literary analysis class a student asked a pointed question about the use of apostrophe pertaining to figurative language. My professor answered the student's question by defining the literary term as well as providing examples. She explained an apostrophe is when the speaker addresses an inadiment object or noun that will and does not have the capability to respond (such as when a speaker of a poem says "Oh, beautiful sky" the sky is not capable of responding to the speaker). The professor went on to offer several more examples of this use of figurative language as cited in the readings as well as through out everyday conversation. She proceeded to ask the class if everyone understood the definition of the word and how it pertained to the unit, and everyone either responded with a yes or a nod of the head. Yet, the professor proceeded with one more example. She then proceeded with another unnecessary example "It is like when you pray to God. You don't get a response. Well, no one sane would receive a response, so I would hope no one in this class would receive a response from her." ...And the entire class laughed, giggled, and commented on how clever our professor is.

Yet, I sat in my seat feeling dumbfounded and as though a line had been crossed.

I should explain that I am a Pentecostal Christian, and I have been raised in a Christian home. Now this statement is often stigmatized with stereotypes of the Planned Parenthood protester and Fox News loving extremist, so please allow me to explain I do not judge anyone for his/her beliefs nor do I believe freedom of speech should be eradicated to allow Christians to feel more comfortable in a secular setting. The Pentecostal branch of Christianity stresses a personal relationship with God. I pray several times a day. I pray conversationally with God, because God is my savior and friend. This means I have a deeply personal relationship with God, and I receive responses from him through prayer. I was severely offended by my professor's statement, and I felt extremely isolated as I heard the entire class giggle at the core foundation of my faith.

I spent the entire remainder of the class in an awkward isolated position in my chair. I tried to block the statement from my mind and concentrate on the academic discussion that was now taking place. This was difficult as I found myself analysing the statement and the mocking tone in which it was made. I do not mind that she referred to God as a her, but it was the tone in which she implied this. I was most offended that she had inadvertently called me, my family, and the followers of my ENTIRE faith insane. Yet, I was saddened that she did not feel remorse for this statement, and no one else in the class appeared to pause and think the statement was inappropriate in an academic setting.

As soon as class was over I called my best friend from back home (South Carolina), and I explained to her the statement, my feelings, and why I was so disappointed in the professor's lack of distinction between free speech and academic responsibility. I suppose I just wanted the professor to realize that she had made an incredibly offensive statement, but my best friend explain that not everyone understand the freedoms we have been granted is also gifted with a responsibility. I had reached my car as my friend had told me this, and I began to cry. I have never cried over a bigoted statement before, but this statement was painful and left me feeling vulnerable and scared to express myself as a Christian openly.